Every time I sync my Zune — every time — it pushes another copy of The Last Poets - “Mean Machine” onto the device. It’s like my Zune is trying to warn me about the Man, which considering its origin, is pretty ironic.

I have 33 copies of the song on there right now as a result. This means that “Mean Machine” comes up inordinately often in shuffle mode. Sure, Zune software has pushed other dupes, but this one is really egregious.

This ordeal is only punctuated by the fact that the very first sounds in the the track are the words “Driving me NUTS!” And, fittingly, the title of the album this track appeared on was This Is Madness.

Maybe my Zune is trying to be a mean machine. Again, irony abounds.

Stealing your time, smooth and slick
with the latest trick to get rich quick
from nonsense at your mind’s expense
as your mind digs the scene
from the Mean Machine
designed to drive your brain insane

While the new Zune software leaves a thing or two to be desired over the previous one (album info updating, ahem), it does make it a lot easier to explore and subscribe to podcasts. Not only does it provide a searchable showcase of popular pods, it makes it a cut-and-paste operation to add a new one, and from then on, the Zune software will automatically download and sync new episodes.

I suppose this is something iTunes has been doing all along, but I’m happy to have it. Interestingly enough, the Zune actually uses the term “podcast”, a Kleenex moment for a word directly derived from the leading competitor.

Thanks to Woot I’ve upgraded from my $40 SD-based MP3 player to a refurbished brown Zune. It’s a great deal and a handy device, especially for the price ($100). I’ve easily put my entire MP3 collection on it, plus a dozen or two of my favorite CDs.

A really nice feature of the Zune software was its auto-rip mode. Setting the software to rip automatically when a CD is entered, and eject when done, made it fairly whiz-bang to copy CDs onto. Insert, close drive, wait a few minutes for drive to eject, put a new CD in and repeat. Sync when done and they’re all on the Zune.

One disappointing fact about the Zune is that despite its ability to play video, it’s really hard to find video to put on it or otherwise get videos onto it. The Zune Marketplace, M$’s answer to the iTunes Store, has no video available on it at all. Just music. The Zune website suggests you do a search for “viral video” to find the gobs of free videos out there. I don’t know when they put this together — the Zune was originally released in late 2006 — but nearly every “viral video” I know of these days is on a flash-video streaming site like Google Video or YouTube. And M$ doesn’t have a comparable video sharing site yet.

There are solutions to this, but none are easy. I’ve tried to find answers to two questions: getting Tivo movies onto Zune, and getting YouTube movies onto Zune. With only free options. There doesn’t seem to be a robust, working free solution to the first problem; the best bet is probably shelling out $25 for Tivo Desktop Plus, which converts its movies to iPod-compatible format, which is also compatible with Zune. As for the latter problem, so far the best answer has been the Videora iPod Converter, from which you can search YouTube and automatically download and convert videos. The software expects to be synching to an iPod, but close out the error popups and dig up the output folder and import it into the Zune library.

While Zune has its limitations, hopefully M$ will get wise and make the Zune more interoperable with the next upgrade. Some rumors say that the next Zune firmware update will allow the Zune’s onboard WiFi to connect directly to the Internet, which seems like a no brainer.

Ever since I first bought an Emprex MP1003 (blogged here), I’ve gone through and assessed a couple of players. (Doesn’t help that I’ve lost one or two.) Here’s a rundown.

• Emprex MP1003
• Pros: Small, cheap
• Cons: Boxy, no track display
• Buy: $20 at Fry’s Outpost

The Emprex was my first model. On sale for $15, it performs the SD MP3 task very simply and cheaply. The only major downside to this unit is the display. Aside from some fixed indicators, the display shows a 3-digit track number and 4-digit time elapsed. Navigation is very difficult when you can’t tell where you are; you have to keep stopping to hear what song you’re on, and hope you remember what order your tracks are in.

• PQI Joytone U801
• Pros: Hand-hold shape, tactile-identifiable buttons
• Cons: Modest display, strange misadvertisement.
• Buy: $23 at Supermediastore

Unlike the other units in this list, the Joytone has a lozenge-type shape, which is more satisfying to hold in the hand than the other more boxy units. The button arrangement is easy to remember and once you remember it, it’s easy to tell whether you’re hitting volume down or track advance. The display on the Joytone is better than the Emprex, as it has a 12-character matrix display which can show track name. However, the display scrolls very slowly, and track number and time elapsed are mixed into the scroll line. Navigation is theoretically improved by this, but not really; with the slow speed of the scroll, you can’t usually tell what track it is right away.

One really strange thing about the Joytone is PQI’s apparent change of heart as to what exactly it is: either a $30 SD MP3 player with 1GB SD card included, or just a $30 1GB MP3 player. The packaging clearly shows a spot where the SD card is displayed, however, new releases of the unit have the SD card already inserted, and a sticker saying “WARRANTY VOID IF REMOVED” over it — not very well, either, since the SD card isn’t quite flush with the side of the unit.

Now, mine worked fine with swapping in and out various cards, and the instructions I had even explained what cards to use and when to swap them. Apparently PQI has decided this is not what they want the Joytone to do anymore. I think this is dumb; if you’re going to create an SD MP3 player, don’t suddenly decide to cripple it with bad policy.

• RCA M2001A
• Pros: 1GB internal memory, great display
• Cons: Boxy, non-textile buttons, poor button response
• Buy: $43 at Zerenox

The RCA M2001 series, apparently the grandchild of the aged Lyra line, blows the other SD MP3s away by coming with 1GB already inside (preloaded with a dozen or so sample songs). The display is a low-power, high-res OLED matrix display that shows track number, time elapsed and remaining, and plenty of track name text all at once. The SD slot doesn’t have a satisfying, secure click-and-spring like the other two (and most SD card slots) have, but the fit is snug enough to secure the card. Just be sure you have some fingernail available if you plan to do lots of card-swapping.

Hey EMI:

Ever heard of EMusic?

I mean, you guys practically have the same name.

I suppose that with major label DRM-free files now available on iTunes, it wouldn’t be a total sin to get an iTMS account. Even though $1.29/song is pretty steep compared to the ~ $0.33 I pay now for indie and DTD (direct to digital) tracks at EMusic… although I don’t usually use my month’s worth, so that’s a misleading price (EMusic is a flat per-month fee for X number of tracks in a month).

Honestly, the winner here will be Apple, with DRM foes (like me) now considering signing up with iTMS and buying some tracks. The loser will probably be EMI, but… will they? At $1.29 a track, a CD’s worth is anywhere from $13 to $20. That’s with no label art, no cover and sleeve art, no plastic case, no printed track listing. Maybe EMI will find out that DRM-free doesn’t cause a surge in losses (any more than a regular CD ever did!) and you get to skimp on the perks.

Also, being first out the door among major labels, they will benefit the most from DRM foes hopping on board. Everyone else will be chasing a longer tail.

This little device costs under $30 and plays MP3s from an SD or MMC card. While $300 iPods corner the MP3 player market, lock your music inside, keep you in an upgrade path, and encourage you to use proprietary formats, a little device like this keeps your cost down and lets you be as flexible as you want with the quality and size of your storage. I picked this up for $28 at Fry’s, though it tends to go on sale for $15; it was tucked away in a lonely, neglected, sparse forgotten far corner of the store. In the same trip I picked up a 1GB SD for $45 (only the second cheapest).

With handheld game software coming on SmartMedia-sized cartridges, and a device like this, it shouldn’t be at all difficult to imagine a future where albums are delivered on 128MB SD cards for use in a player like this.